Revs Relationship Advice – The Bent Musket

For any New England Revolution fans looking for a tactical analysis of the team on the pitch, this article isn’t for you.

But some tactics will be discussed. Tactics regarding matters of the heart.

For those who don’t know (basically everyone), yours truly is getting married on Memorial Day. Seeing that the Revs will be on an international break, I’m going to take some time to rest and relax on a beach south of the border before diving back into club coverage (no, I’ll probably ask my wife what formation suits the better at the Revolution or if Jon Bell really is the greatest athlete of this generation).

But since I got married, I decided to seek advice, and who better to turn to than the Revolution. This item will also serve as a digital keepsake of my special day.

So while you probably haven’t asked, here’s some relationship advice from some New England players.

Bell and Arnór Traustason kept it short and sweet. Traustason told me to say yes and amen to everything my wife says to me and Bell told me to make sure she’s always happy.

With the two comments being a week apart, the fact that they work so well together is quite amazing. This advice should get me away from the doghouse and not sleeping on the couch (where I’m currently typing this article).

Gustavo Bou also told me that marriage is a big step and congratulated me on this momentous occasion.

“First of all, congratulations, I hope you enjoy it and enjoy every step of it, and I hope you, when you’re ready, start a family,” he said.

To break the fourth wall here, I didn’t expect Gustavo Bou and my grandparents to have anything in common, but both mentioned that my wife and I eventually had kids before my wedding day. I appreciated the kind words and will do my best to enjoy this special day.

So I hope the good readers of TBM won’t miss me too much while I take an international break, but I take this opportunity to thank all of you who take the time to read the work we have published here and look forward to the remainder of the 2022 MLS season.