“How to Remarry” by Jill Curtis is a self-help book whose primary concern is how to plan a second marriage without emotional outbursts, tears, and awkwardness. “The largest proportion of all marriages in the UK today are second marriages for one or both partners.”
“The book is dedicated to all newlyweds seeking happiness a second time.”
– Advertising –
The author gives tips on how to plan your second wedding. A second marriage comes with a host of problems and conflicts. The author gives rules and etiquettes on how to handle things smoothly.
Rule #1: Consider the budget between yourselves.
Rule #2: There are many ways to make the wedding special. It is your decision.
– Advertising –
Rule #3: Don’t care what people will think. It’s your day.
In the case of a second marriage, you need to be more careful. You don’t want to repeat the mistakes of your past. It should be noted that getting married a second time is not taboo. Guilt should not interfere. It is a form of care and attention.
The word “etiquette” is conventional and means that you have a cordial demeanor and are wary of making others feel uncomfortable.
The wedding will only go smoothly if special care has been taken in its preparation. A wedding planner is the ideal choice. This will save you all the hassle and hassle.
The excitement of going to a wedding is unparalleled. Everyone is carried away with joy, and even single women and bachelors want to get married.
As the couple take their wedding vows, tears overflow. Is it because they are reminded of the purity of the vows they took in their first marriage? A second marriage is not all joy. Painful memories are attached to it. And before breaking the news to anyone else, clear things up in your mind first.
The author introduces the reader to new and recent online dating apps as a way to meet people. However, although it seems like a good opportunity, the fact that you are talking to a complete stranger is a bit dangerous. It would be good to bring a friend or relative with you and meet in a public place.
In the event that one of the spouses has children, his parents are likely to go ballistic upon hearing the news that their daughter is marrying this man. However, if the girl has made up her mind and the children wholeheartedly accept their new mother, there is a happy ending. Parents too will forget their differences and share happiness.
Give the news of your marriage to your ex directly and not through a third party. Invite them to your wedding, but don’t introduce them as your ex. Keep it simple. In the case of your in-laws, prepare them in advance. If you are widowed or widowed, try to have a face-to-face meeting, which is difficult as they may remember their grief. If you have children from your first marriage, be sure to invite them over and send their photos to the grandparents.
The younger you are, the more moldable you are. As you age, your habits become fixed and that is why divorce rates are higher. In the case of second marriages, where your husband is deceased, the mother-in-law treats the daughter-in-law as her daughter. The new mother-in-law wants things her way. It’s a tricky situation. Unfortunately, there are no strict rules for dealing with such a situation.
How will your friends react to your decision to remarry? The first question they will ask is are you happy? Your real friends won’t be concerned about the magnitude of the event. They will be happy with your happiness and the important people are the ones that matter.
The reaction of children is another concern. Someone will wholeheartedly embrace the idea of a second marriage while others will throw a hoarse. Tell her the news privately and give her time to process it.
The following quote sheds light on personal choice in a marriage.
“All weddings are similar, but every wedding is different.”
For example, you can decide to be different in how you want to advertise. You can come up with innovative ideas. If you are widowed, you can pass your ring on to your daughter.
The trend of having a bridal shower in the US is being replaced by a couple shower in the UK. It is a more inclusive term. The word bride comes from the English word meaning “to cook”. This is the conventional definition of a bride. But in modern times, that’s not all a woman has to do.
Finally, the author says that age does not matter. You can be 10 years younger or older. What matters is the mental compatibility and the fact that both spouses love and understand each other.
Jill Curtis ends the book on a note that marriage doesn’t have to be big. Maybe the man wants an intimate marriage. Both man and woman need to understand each other’s concerns before grudges creep in between them and set the stage for resentment.
The book is a wonderful and detailed overview of a second marriage. This is a must read for anyone going through marital issues. The second marriage is not a taboo.